Whatever the reason, being disabled in todays world, still very much has its downfalls, not that there are very many upsides besides good parking.  I recently was walking (rolling) down the street and two men in a truck yelled “Stupid Crippled” while driving by. Of course they didn’t have the balls to stop and say it to my face, but yes, these things are still a very big problem in our world.

In the disabled community, we don’t have groups that march on congress, or valued leaders like Martin Luther King Jr. who are willing to stand up and fight for equal rights. No, instead we are the voices who cannot be heard. We struggle in a society that gain’s.  Social Security is reduced, healthcare worsens, jobs for disabled are reduced. We are at the bottom with no way to climb up because there are only stairs.

I write this after a very frustrating day of living through it. There are only so many times a man can get knocked down before the 10 count finnally reaches 11 and there is no more energy to get up.  You are passed the point of frustation and head towards hopelessness.  The world tightens, and everything in it works against you. No raise at work, no money for healthcare and doctors, stuck in section 8 housing, and all because we have been forgotten about. All because we have no way to spread the word that we are dying a slow and painful death in which there is no cure. Simply put, we are the minorty whom society has forgotten about.

(2) Three disabled guys (a blind man, an amputee, and a guy in a wheelchair) are flying home, when their plane crashes in the Sahara Desert. The three disabled guys  decide they cant wait for help, so they start their way through the desert. They start to get real thirsty, so they decide to seek out water. The amputee leads the way, with the blind man pushing the guy in the wheelchair; and, eventually they find an oasis. The amputee goes into the water first, cools himself down, drinks a load of water, walks out the other side and lo and behold, he has a NEW LEG! He gets excited and encourages his friends to do the same. The blind man offers to push the guy in the wheelchair, but he gets refused because the guy in the chair wants to be Mr Independent and isists the blind man goes ahead first. So he goes into the water, cools himself down, drinks a load of water, walks out the other side and low and behold, he can SEE! Now the guy in the wheelchair’s getting really excited, starts pushing with all his might, goes into the water, cools himself down, drinks a load of water, and wheels out the other side. Low and behold, NEW TIRES!!!

(3) There once was a lady who was tired of living alone. So she put an ad in the paper which outlined her requirements. She wanted a man who (1) would treat her nicely, (2) wouldn’t run away from her, and (3) would be good in bed.

Then, one day, she heard the doorbell ring. She answered it, and there on the front porch was a man in a wheelchair who didn’t have any arms or legs.

“I’m here about the ad you put in the paper. As you can see, I have no arms so I can’t beat you, and I have no legs so I can’t run away from you.”

“Yes, but are you good in bed?”

“How do you think I rang the doorbell?”

(4) One day, three boys were walking over a bridge when they heard a guy yelling for help. It was President Bush. He was drowning, and the three boys rescued him.  He thanked them dearly and promised them whatever they wanted as a reward.
The first boy wanted $10,000, so Bush gave him the money.
The second boy wanted a Ferrari, so Bush gave the boy a Ferrari.
The third boy wanted a wheelchair , Bush said, “Why do you want one of those, son, you’re not disabled .”
The boy replied,”I will be when my dad finds out whose life I just saved.”

(5) There was a man who got into a car accident. He was soon rushed to the hospital. The left side of his body was completely paralyzed. The family asked the doctor how bad in shape he was.

The doctor said, “He was going to be all right.”

On June 23, 2008 a man in Austrailia was charged with a DUI while falling asleep in his motor wheelchair. And in June 2007 a canadian man was also given a DUI for driving his motor wheelchair from his local pub to his Mum’s house. But has there ever been a case in the United States where a disabled person was sentenced or fined with a DUI with there wheelchair?  According to United States laws “Any person who operates a  wheelchair can be issued a drunk driving ticket and a wheelchair is considered a vehicle in most of the United States.”

I have used and will continue to use a wheelchair for the rest of my life, and think this is complete and utter bullshit. People who drink and drive are given the choice to drive there cars. People who use wheelchairs are not given a choice to get from point A to point B and 100% rely on there wheelchairs as a source of mobility, and because of that we are not allowed to walk (wheel) home drunk like every other drunk person in America? Fuck that! I will not only continue to drive my wheelchair drunk, I will piss on every street corner and puke on every curb while doing so!

The next day the same man is walking on the beach and he comes across the same girl, and she is once again crying. So he ask “why are you crying now?” once again she replies “well, I have never been kissed before.” So the man bends over and gives her a big kiss.

The following day the man comes across the woman, and she is still crying. He ask her “why are you crying today? I have hugged you, kissed you, what is wrong now?” She replies “well I have never been fucked before. So the man picks her up, throws her in the water, and says “well your Fucked Now.”

My all time favorite…………

If you have some better Jokes, Feel free to add a comment and share with the world.